Goblin Talk

A random, short format, variety show goblin podcast

It should of be no surprise to anyone, anymore, that humans seem to place a strange importance on the color of one’s skin. This leads to strife, and turmoil, and bloody chaos; which honestly, we are all for, in the right context. But recent events have really started to get out of hand. So we are here to say:  Please, think of the GOBLINS!

It is true, we are oppressed all the friggen time! And it is always over the same silly things you humans are abusing each other for. The color of our skin, the length of our noses, the strange things we eat, our violent destructive tendancies, or that one time we accidentally “borrowed” a child that was already spoken for…

I mean, really, if you don’t want someone to take the baby just lying there sleeping, swaddled in a blanket, secure in it’s playpen, with the front doors locked, the dog on guard, and the alarm system turned on—JUST LEAVE A FRIGGEN NOTE! Seriously, if he was that important to you, why is it so hard to take a few precautions to ensure his safety. Sheesh…

Anyhow, Wedji TuCheeks decided to hit the mean streets of Baltimore to put an end to this oppressive nonsense once and for all. It is time for some Goblin Outreach, the key to combating the stigma in the communities where we live and work. Or at the very least, transferring it over to the trolls. Really, if you want to oppress someone, they are ripe for the position and too dumb to even realize it is happening. As we always say, Trolls Drool & Goblins Rule!

So go Green! (ish… Brown. Yeah, go brown. Green is kinda gross.)

-G

 

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10433895_10203509508672762_2895839784866998352_nHappy Holidays everyone! In our final episode of 2014, we discuss all the Winter Holidays, the War on Xmas, what to get Wedji as a gift, and our favorite Christmas carol. Enjoy!

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10514666_797254986993756_5805913631133398146_nWelcome to our very special Thanksgiving Episode, with the fabulous Dawn Hunt of Cucina Aurora Kitchen Witchery! In this episode we talk about food, oil, farts, popcorn, parades, children’s books, Italians, and being thankful. We even let Azog chime in! It is extra long, but you have the time off anyways, so enjoy!
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Gandersnitch the Goblin wrote a book! And it is a pretty swell book. Full of murder, and mayhem, and goblin philosophy, and queens flicking boogers, and one night stands, and evil spells, and whiskey (a little bit even spilled on the pages as he was writing, what a waste!). And you can get a copy!

Well, you can get a copy once he hits the kickstarter goal to have it printed. Until then, it resides safely in an un-smashable chest under Azog’s bed. Cause it turns out that editing and printing a book (and recording an audio cd of the book) takes a bit of capital. We tried paying with teeth… It didn’t work. And no, we don’t know what happened to the tooth fairy! Don’t ask us! We never saw her!

Anyways, check out the kickstarter. Laugh at the video. Drool over the awesome rewards. Get your book. Share with your friends. And show your love and appreciate for GOBLINS! And here is a little secret just for you – once we raise 50% of the necessary funds, there will be another video going up. The outtakes one. And it is so funny that Posie is going to pee in her pants watching it!

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10323613_10152383227626399_683144360_oAs we are still insanely busy dealing with life and freak shows and festivals and late night ER visits for crazy fragile humans that pass out on pain meds for no apparent reason… And because we love Posie and she seemed very sad that Gandersnitch said we were waiting a WHOLE year to post this episode – we have now uploaded the second session of our super awesome live recording thingy from Spoutwood Farms May Day Faerie Festival.

And what is so awesome about this insanely long (41 min) episode of Goblin Talk?

It has TWIG! And Posie. And a Bush. And Azog…

And they have a dance off. Which makes no sense on radio, but it was pretty funny in person. So, listen to the episode and enjoy. And next year, don’t miss out. See it LIVE… in a barn. (Yeah. They stuck us in a barn. Where we belong!)

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This is our first podcast ever!

But don’t worry, it is really short. Only five minutes long.
And it is funny. And it has goblins. And we wish a happy birthday to Krii.

So really, you should listen to it.
Heck, you can listen to it while you poop.
You take your phone in there anyways, I know you do!

Hey! We’re Goblins! you think we know this tech stuff?

well, we are swapping things around and this here is a TEST!  boom!  with EXPLOSIONS!  okay, maybe not explosions, but BOOM stuff!  LA!
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